In this episode, Deborah Mallow, a motivational speaker and “ray of sunshine,” shares practical ways to choose happiness, interrupt negative thinking, and bring more light into everyday life. A central theme is the power of simple tools—like a gratitude jar—to retrain the brain to notice what is going right instead of what is wrong.
About Deborah Mallow
Deborah is a positive energy and success coach who helps people shift out of self-sabotage and chronic negativity.
She is the author of “6 Steps to Fewer Days That Suck,” where she offers stories, strategies, and science-backed tips for cultivating a more uplifting mindset.
Key topics discussed
Negativity bias and the brain: How the brain’s ancient focus on problems and danger creates more “bad days” than necessary, and what it takes to interrupt that pattern.
Being personally considerate: Treating yourself with the same kindness you offer others and replacing harsh self-talk with more supportive thoughts.
Small daily practices: Simple habits—like dancing to a favorite song or using a “make me smile” box—that help your nervous system shift toward calm, joy, and resilience.
The gratitude jar practice
Deborah explains the gratitude jar: writing one good thing each day on a slip of paper and dropping it into a jar to create a visible record of what’s going well.
On tough days, pulling out a few slips offers concrete reminders that life holds many moments of joy, connection, and progress, even when current circumstances feel heavy.
Practical takeaways
Start with one small shift: notice when your mind spirals into worst-case scenarios and gently ask, “What would I rather be thinking right now?”
Create your own happiness tools: a gratitude jar, a smile box, or a short list of “go-to” feel-good activities to use when your mood dips.
Remember that you have more control over your daily happiness than you think; your choices and focus can steadily lead to fewer days that “suck.”
Deborah Mallow and the Gratitude Jar
Invisible Warriors
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Before the hustle of Thanksgiving week begins, Invisible Warriors is inviting women veterans, their families, and friends to gather for a heartfelt Friendsgiving Celebration at the Huntsville Military Women’s Community Center, located at 140 Research Blvd., Madison, AL, on Saturday, November 22 from 12 PM to 4 PM.
This community meal is more than turkey and trimmings — it’s a table where stories, laughter, and new connections are served up in equal portions. Sponsored by Inspirations by Robin and Rocket City Rocks Boxing Club, the afternoon will feature great food, family-friendly activities, and a chance to meet the remarkable women who have served our nation.
“Many women veterans don’t realize how many sisters-in-arms live right here in North Alabama,” said Nancy Becher, Executive Director of Invisible Warriors. “This Friendsgiving is our way of saying, you belong here. We’re celebrating their service and reminding them — and our community — that no one heals or celebrates alone.”
The event is open to all, and media outlets are encouraged to attend and meet the women shaping a new chapter of community and connection for military families in the Tennessee Valley.
Want to know more about Invisible Warriors?Sign up for our newsletterto receive regular updates. Contact us HERE. Or click the button below to schedule a meeting with Founder Nancy Becher!
The world would have so much more understanding and empathy if we all were a bit more open about our stories and how they have helped shape our journey and worldview. Let’s jump in with a fun one: Have any recent moments made you laugh or feel proud? From September 25–28, Grand Oak Retreat in Scottsboro, AL, hosted the first of what Invisible Warriors hopes will be many retreats for women veterans. This was a safe space where women who’ve served our country could simply breathe, connect, and be heard.
For many attendees, the toll of military life lingers as Post-Traumatic Stress (PTS) and Military Sexual Trauma (MST). The Department of Veterans Affairs notes that MST affects nearly 1 in 3 women veterans, and that women are twice as likely as men to develop PTS. Numbers like these aren’t abstract; they’re people, strong, brave people who deserve community, care, and a real shot at healing.
What I found most powerful about this weekend wasn’t the activities (though they were meaningful): it was the quiet moments when someone spoke honestly about her darkest days, and the group responded with listening, affirmation, and practical steps forward. As an Invisible Warriors spokesperson put it, “Isolation makes trauma worse. These retreats remind women veterans that they are not alone, that healing happens in community.”
A few moments that stayed with me:
One veteran, who had been red-flagged for suicide attempts five times, shared that she no longer feels the urge to harm herself. “Now I know there are others who care, who will show up if I call. I’m not alone anymore,” she said—tears and hope in the same breath.
Another attendee found the courage to pursue stability by filing for disability benefits. With peer encouragement, she completed her intent-to-file paperwork before the weekend ended, taking a concrete step toward the support she earned through service.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique? Drawing from her own experiences and educational background—including a Master’s in Counseling and a Ph.D. (ABD) in Sociology from Western Michigan University—Nancy works with women veterans and others facing invisible disabilities like PTSD and MST. As an International #1 bestselling author, certified Peer Support Specialist, and Chaplain, she founded Invisible Warriors to provide resources, training, and support that help military women recognize their worth and potential. Nancy continues to expand her skills as a Mental Health Coach, staying committed to breaking cycles of loss and empowering others through her work. You can reach her at [email protected].
Okay, so here’s a deep one: What’s a moment that really shaped how you see the world? Watching the vast number of women veterans who have given so much of themselves and their lives to support our country, yet seeing them dismissed, undervalued, and treated as less worthy than their male counterparts—that fundamentally changed how I see the world. These women served with the same dedication and sacrifice, but their struggles, especially with invisible wounds like PTS and MST, are often overlooked or minimized. Witnessing that disparity opened my eyes to how much work needs to be done to ensure women veterans receive the recognition, support, and care they’ve earned. It’s what drives everything I do with Invisible Warriors—making sure these women know they matter and that their service counts just as much as anyone else’s.
Was there ever a time you almost gave up? Almost daily, honestly. Fighting against the unjust actions around us, the lack of support from society, and even from those who should care most about these women—it wears on you. There are moments when it feels like you’re pushing against an impossible weight. But then something happens that reminds me God is watching. A breakthrough, a connection, someone’s life changing—these moments show me there’s still hope, still support, and that the world is still fundamentally a good place. Those reminders keep me going, even on the hardest days.
Sure, so let’s go deeper into your values and how you think. Is the public version of you the real you? Absolutely. What you see is what you get. I don’t have the energy to pretend to be someone I’m not—this work is too important and too personal for that. My passion for supporting women veterans comes directly from my own experiences and what I’ve witnessed. The struggles, the frustrations, even the moments of doubt I share publicly—they’re all real. I believe authenticity is essential in this work because the women I serve need to know I truly understand, that I’ve been in the trenches too. So yes, the public Nancy is the real Nancy—flawed, determined, and completely committed to this mission.
Okay, so before we go, let’s tackle one more area. Are you doing what you were born to do—or what you were told to do? I’m doing what I was born to do. This wasn’t the path anyone laid out for me or told me to follow—it found me through my own experiences and the injustices I couldn’t ignore. When you witness women who’ve sacrificed so much being dismissed and undervalued, you can’t just look away. This work chose me as much as I chose it. Everything in my life—my education, my struggles, my faith—has led me here. Supporting women veterans and those with invisible disabilities isn’t just a job or a calling someone handed me; it’s woven into who I am. I finally feel like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be, doing exactly what I’m meant to do.
HUNTSVILLE, Ala. (WHNT) — The Huntsville Military Women’s Community Center is the first-of-its-kind in the region and will benefit female veterans directly.
“Our mission is to create a dedicated, welcoming space where military women can receive the support, resources, and recognition they deserve. Too often, women veterans are unseen or underserved; this center exists to change that,” said Center Officials.
The Center will serve as a hub for connection, community, and healing for veterans in need of it.
“Women veterans have carried the weight of service with strength and courage, but too often their sacrifices have gone unseen. This center changes that. We are here to honor their service, provide the resources they need to thrive, and create a space where they are truly seen, heard, and valued. Our hope is that the Huntsville Military Women’s Community Center becomes not only a lifeline, but also a beacon for what it looks like when a community stands behind its veterans,” said Huntsville Military Women’s Community Center’s Executive Director Nancy Becher.
According to officials, the center will also provide resources that address post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and military sexual trauma (MST). Additionally, housing insecurity, transportation barriers, childcare needs will also be covered by these resources.
The Huntsville Military Women’s Community Center is aiming to raise awareness in the community about the sacrifices and unique challenges faced by women who serve.
The center will provide the following services:
Intake & Coordination: Women veterans meet with intake specialists (college interns serving in supervised placements) who guide them to the right resources.
Mental Health & Telehealth: Offered through partner organizations under Memorandums of Understanding (MOUs). All clinical services are provided in-kind by trusted professionals.
Practical Support: Access to transportation, housing assistance, hygiene kits, and food support through community partnerships.
Family Support: Also led by MOU partnerships, Volunteer-led daycare (with background-checked caregivers) to ensure veterans can access services without worrying about childcare.
Community Space: Our facility includes private offices for intake, group meeting areas, and larger event spaces to host retreats, peer support groups, and recognition ceremonies.
Most of these services are provided at no cost to veterans. The center is currently operating out of a shared, fully accessible facility with both event and office space. Officials are continuing to plan for a facility they can call their own in the future.
Becher believes the center will become a model for how communities can step forward and honor those who have served.
Invisible Warriors Connects Veterans to Crucial Services
Connecting veterans to crucial services was the point of the recent vendor expo held by Invisible Warriors in Huntsville, AL. Despite vendor shortfall, North Alabama organizations rally to make sure veterans know about the many organizations that exist to support them. Female veterans’ advocacy group “Invisible Warriors” hosted a community resource expo, open to all veterans, amid what organizers are calling “dwindling support for veterans.”
Invisible Warriors wants you to know that we see you and we honor you for your service. Find support for women in the military, both active duty and veterans. Connecting veterans to the crucial services you need and resources and organizations that can help you to thrive are a core part of the mission of Invisible Warriors.
If you are an organization serving military women, please connect with us. We are building a resource and service network and would like to talk with you about promoting your organization. Contact us HERE to discuss how we can work together.
Watch the news report from Alabama Fox 54 on Invisible Warriors HERE.
Rally to connect veterans to crucial services
Invisible Warriors
Want to know more about Invisible Warriors?Sign up for our newsletterto receive regular updates. Contact us HERE. Or click the button below to schedule a meeting with Founder Nancy Becher!
